So that’s a 14 hour wait for treatment. 14 hours of my immune system attacking my spinal cord. 14 hours of inflammation leading to permanent damage of nerves – the nerves that help me walk, see, urinate, breathe. NMO causes permanent disability. NMO can kill.
“Don’t film me looking disabled.” Those weren’t my exact words, I said “Do you have to film me walking up the stairs?” but I only said it because I think […]
Sometimes you don’t know what it is that’s been missing until you’re crying with relief in your kitchen after a day filming with BBC 3.
So what do you do when the tables are turned? When you are the one struggling to cope? When you are the one needing help? When you could do with a wish?
I’ve never felt more suffocated than when surrounded by the crotches of 30 hungry tourists.
It’s incredibly hard to explain to someone who hasn’t been paralysed just exactly what it feels like.
Blue orchids. The moony whites of her smiling eyes in the darkness. My reflection in the back of a teaspoon. Words, making their way to the yellow-tinged edge of the […]
I let the MRI Machine of Certain Death consume me and whiled away the following hour of clicks and buzzes and whirring, wondering where the paralysis would stop. How long until my arms are numb?
The hardest part of having a chronic illness is not the pain, it’s not the fatigue or the worry, or the medical bills or the medication – it’s the smiling and pretending to […]